“Oh my God, I am so burned out.”
“I am just so burned out on this.”
“Just thinking about it stresses me out.”
Does this sound familiar? It does to me. I hear comments along these lines all the time.
One of the most common conversations I have with individuals is the topic of burnout (mostly because I love to talk about it). When 2020 happened and individuals were working at home and—ironically—working more, burnout went from passive conversation to an active topic everyone was talking about. In fact, I was so engrossed with this concept during the pandemic I wrote my grad thesis proposal about it and how the pandemic remote working model would lead to burnout in employees which would result in high turnover experienced in all industries. Time will tell if I was correct or not.
But I want to talk about how you can take better care of yourself as a writer and individual. To do that, I need to dive a little further into burnout syndrome and why it’s a more serious matter than assumed. For the most part, some individuals see burnout as an excuse to avoid a situation or activity or believe it to be a momentary phase. The truth is burnout recovery can take up to anywhere from six months to several years. What some individuals overlook when they think about burnout is how its symptoms and recovery period mirror Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I sat in on a seminar on this topic and it opened my mind to just how detrimental burnout can be to a person’s mentality and the ripple effect on other aspects of their lives.
“But Carrow, how does burnout happen? What situations occur which cause this to happen?” If only I had a clear answer to give. The truth is burnout is different for each person and can happen for a number of different reasons. One common element is when what you are doing stops being fun and you are working under pressure. Sometimes the pressure is self-imposed, or it can originate from an external source. But burnout syndrome is one of those areas in which taking steps towards prevention will take you further than recovery.
And that is what we are going to focus on.
What should your first step be in preventing burnout? The simple answer is knowing yourself and where your limitations are.
Dear Writer, Are you Burned Out? by Becca Syme is a reference I encourage all writers experiencing burnout to have in their personal library. It covers warning signs, stages, and suggestions to help you recover. In it, Becca Syme has one part of her book I want to expand on here to help you understand yourself and how you can use that for self-care. It is something I have recommended individuals do when they first talk to me about how tired and mentally exhausted they are.
The book discusses the Penny Day Approach (how I call it) and how everything costs you. And I do mean everything. If you wake up and have to make a choice between only drinking coffee or cooking yourself breakfast? Well, that costs you two pennies because it was an active choice you had to make. Cleaning up after you finish eating? Listened to some music you enjoy while eating your meal? Gain a penny back. Costs one penny. Took a moment to read a book you really like? Gain one penny back. Got a call from a distressed friend who needed someone to vent to? That’s five pennies because of the mental toll.
Here is an example of my Tuesday morning for you.
Carrow Daily Penny Count: 500 pennies
- Alarm goes off at 6:30 AM and I get up: -2 pennies for action and willpower
- Do 30 min cardio: +1 for running/+2 pennies if Beat Saber
- Round up Dogs for feeding: -1 penny
- Drink Coffee with Husband: +1 penny for face time
- Work on Burnout Prevent Blog: -10 pennies for mental effort and action
- Check Client Email and send notifications: -5 pennies for mental effort
- Make plans with gamer friend to do a game raid: +1 penny
- Get ready for work: -2 pennies
- Listen to an audiobook on the way to work: +1 penny
Between the hours of 6:30 a.m. and 9:30 a.m., I lost a total of 20 pennies and gained 4 pennies back. I am very tired in the morning. I haven’t included items such as hosting write-in streams, what I do at work, book writing, or any domestic duties around the house. And you may also notice that doing things costs more than what we can get back in a day. What makes this activity even more “fun” is the realization that not everyone starts off with the same amount of pennies to work with. I listed 500 pennies, but you may have more or less, depending on your personal energy level. There is no universal baseline to work with, which many don’t understand. And—AND—some activities may cost you more than it would cost others because it is either a new habit you are working into your routine, or you don’t enjoy it when others do. This is where those fun personal differences come from. For example, someone may feel refreshed from baking a loaf of bread whereas someone who can’t cook would stress out about burning down the kitchen.
For us to take care of ourselves, we have to understand our limits. It’s too easy to look at someone else, see what they are doing and wonder why we can’t produce the same amount of results they do.
“They write a book a month, why can’t I?”
The comparison game is a dangerous one and can lead to individuals extending more energy than they have which results in, you guessed it, burnout. I often say the internal pressure we place on ourselves is more dangerous than external because it is easier to tell someone, “That is too much for me to do” than to say to ourselves, “I can’t juggle all this.” Many of us are prideful and afraid of failure, and we will do everything we can to not look like a ‘loser’ to our peers.
The penny activity is a great and effortless self-awareness activity to use. It may only take you a few days to see where you are spending your pennies and where you get them back. And if you find yourself always costing more than gaining back, that’s when we can move into acts of self-care. Because a writer who can’t write doesn’t get any books finished, do they?
“How do I get those pennies back?”
That question is a personal one for you to answer, but I do have a list of self-care activities that you can consider for yourself and see about implementing into your daily schedule. I do try to keep these options all 50-50 for you.
- Make your bed
- Go for a walk
- Sing along with a song you enjoy
- Talk to a friend who you smile with
- Watch a show or movie you enjoy
- Meditate for ten minutes
- Snuggle a pet
- Take part in an activity you enjoy
- Journal (even if it is just a sentence a day).
- Drink water
- Wear your favorite outfit
- Morning stretches
- Wash your face
- Sleep in if you don’t have to wake up early
If you struggle with trying to fit self-care and activities that re-energize you, you can do what I do and schedule it. I refer to it as my mandatory fun time and put it in my planner/calendar so I have that to look forward to. Even if it is me giving myself an hour to enjoy a bottle of wine and watch a show, I put it down.
No one will take care of you more than you will allow yourself to do, so do that.
Take care of yourself.